New Babies, New Connections, New Lives

Writing this blog is not as easy as I thought it would be. I have so many days when I really feel like writing something about my mom but I just can't seem to get the words out. This has been an amazing couple of months for me because I have had some wonderful experiences that have made me think about my amazing mother and remember how lucky I am to have had her in my life.

First, my best friend Molly had her first baby girl! Then, one of my other best friends Jackie had a little boy! It was incredibly stressful for me as a friend because they had their babies two days apart (what are the chances??) and I live about 4,000 miles away from both of them, and I didn't really feel like I was "part of the process" like I would have been if I was living in the US. My mom would have been so happy, proud, amazed, and in awe of these two incredible moms for being so brave and inspiring through their birth processes, and then she would have been the first person I would have called after I got the news that the babies had been born. My friend Molly called me on the way to the hospital, and then I didn't hear from her for two days, and when I finally heard, I cried tears of relief, pride, and happiness all at the same time. My mom would have been a big part of those few days for me, listening to me worrying and telling me that everything would be okay, and then crying with me when the news came.

Next, I was in the airport traveling from England to the US to go to Advocacy Days in DC, and I was delayed several hours due to a volcanic eruption in Iceland. As everyone on our flight shuffled around the gate with looks of stress and angst, I randomly bumped into a really great guy. I instantly felt a connection with him like we were old friends reunited, which I hardly ever feel with men. He turned out to be really helpful in finding me a way to get to DC after I had missed my connecting flight, and later I connected with him on Facebook. I still don't really KNOW him, but through our brief messages on Facebook, I have found that I share a lot in common with him. A few days ago he posted a message about how much emptiness he feels from the loss of his mother. How strange that two people randomly bump into each other, so far from home, and have such a similar story. Sometimes when these weird things happen I wonder if there is a place like heaven, where two souls could come together and decide that they want their children to meet. Maybe Jay's mom and my mom were in heaven making cookies together and thought we would be good friends. Not that I believe in any of that or anything...

Now we come to this weekend, where my second-oldest friend from way back in the recesses of my childhood, is getting married. My mom and her mom were very close friends and shared a lot of their major life experiences together. I bet that Carol is thinking about my mom this weekend and feeling sad that her best friend is not there for her daughter's wedding. Carol was there at my wedding, my brother's wedding, and my mom's funeral, and was a big part of my life growing up.

I guess my life will always have these times when there are clusters of events that all really remind me of my mom, and maybe the reason for that is just to remind me one more time how lucky I was to have her for the time that I did. Maybe these moments happen to mess with my emotions, or maybe they aren't related at all and I want them to be. Either way, I have been thinking about my mom A LOT for the past two months (more than normal) and my only conclusion is that I really, really miss her. Still.