Because I Knew You

Someone's life is made or broken by the way that they are raised from a very young age. I have been formed into the person that I am by the way that my parents raised me and the morals and values that they instilled in me. My everyday life is held up by a framework of 'Mom and Dadisms.' The things I say, the way I react to situations and people, and the decisions I make are all a reflection of my set of standards, the majority of which came from my childhood upbringing. I see examples every day of people who are living examples of good and bad parenting. I am one of the lucky ones. I had two parents that loved each other with all of their souls and were honest, loving, and selfless people. In my mind, nobody was as much in love as my parents were. They taught me about what marriage should be, what love looks like, how a man should look at a woman to be able to tell her that he would live and die for her, and how to argue in a civilized way without hurting each other. Everything I ever wanted in a marriage was set as an example by my parents.
I've always had a very close relationship with both of my parents, and although my father served more as a guardian, provider, and overseer, my mother was more of my emotional supporter. My mother was not only my parent but also more importantly, my best friend. She was the most important force in my life for the first 26 years of it. When my mother died in December of 2005 it left a giant, unfillable hole in my life. I didn't know what to do, or how to continue on living in a world where she didn't exist. This blog is a jumping off point for a book that I am working on about how to grieve, pick up the pieces, and continue your life after you lose a parent. Here goes...